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Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Discouragement

Let me just start by saying that at the beginning I too had moments of thinking we were crazy to drag our children down to Central America.  I have no bad feelings toward anyone who may thought anything similar.

Now, onto the stuff I don't really want to share.

We've been feeling discouraged lately.   I think a lot of it has to do with seeing our family together and loving it, then returning home.  We really feel like we're missing half of us.  Top this with the fact that Nicaragua 'technically' isn't open for adoptions and we're feeling pretty down.  Then, to add to the stress, Maricela isn't doing well at the orphanage.  I can't go into it here, but she had a fight with her sister and it's not exactly smooth sailing there right now. 

More than anything I just want to be with the girls.  I know we don't know them that well.  I know it's going to be hard, but I am ready to offer them a life with our family without anymore significant transitions.  A life where they don't have to wonder if they'll be sent home.  A life where they can become secure in a family, their family and have that identity.  I don't care where we have to be.  Nicaragua, Oregon, Korea...it's not important.  That we're together is what is most important.  I hope and pray that we are the vehicle God uses to give these girls that.

The bottom line we're resting on is God's word.  Thoughout that good book He talks about orphans.  He loves them.  They are close to his heart.  We are commanded to take care of them.  I know that his best for the girls will be better than I can imagine.  I'm just praying, and asking you to pray too, that the doors open soon for us to be a part of that best. 

Thanks, friends.  We love you!

Jenni

2 comments:

Britney said...

I love your rawness. And I totally relate.

Kara said...

You're always in my prayers, Sis. Or rather, in the vernacular down here... All Y'all are in my prayers.

Love you!